Two Words

I've been doing some mental inventory regarding my ideas about parenting, and I have unearthed many pairs of words that I use on a regular basis that may or may not be working:

play date
time out
not now
maybe later
we'll see
please don't
please stop
stop now
one, two...
because (yes, this is one word, but when you say it like a mom it sounds like two)

It's time for some new words around here. Time to replenish mommy's bag of tricks.

Parenting is an uncharted journey in unpredictable waters. It may be smooth sailing for weeks, even months, then all of the sudden, you hit rough waters. Time to check the map and plot your journey. Fortunately, I have a co-captain.

Two words: Positive Discipline. George and I started reading the book together before bed. It doesn't get any hotter than that, does it? He reads a few pages, I read a few pages, and that way we are on the same page.

Two more words: quiet time. We are giving it a try. It is an old trick that is new to us. We each took an hour on our own this afternoon; the kids in their bedrooms, George on the couch with the new Mother Earth News, me at the laptop. All of us quietly doing our own thing. I look forward to a repeat performance tomorrow afternoon.


  1. Remember the game, who can be the quietest the longest? Good game.

  2. when i homeschooled, right after lunch we had mandatory quiet time, in our rooms with our favorite book or quiet activity. It helped soooo much...and i hear you about everything going so well and then BAM, nothing is working like it used to...we are going through that at our house right now too.

  3. I love that book!

    I have my sets of two words too. My fallback, "we'll see" backfired a while back when Annika used her limited Spanish knowledge to claim that "Mommy said yes in Spanish!"

  4. lol, sarah!

    good luck with the new approach, molly. sometimes you need to change things up. it keeps them on their toes. ;^)

  5. Life is funny. Our speaker today at MOPS spoke on "Practical, Positive Discipline Tips for Your Children." There has been much talk around here today about "positive discipline." He is speaking at William Jessup Univ. on Sat., March 8th, if you want to come with me. Dr. Ken Logan - he was an awesome speaker. I'm hooked.

    And I love the game who can be quiet the longest. Never works for us, though!

  6. It does seem to go in waves. Thank you for the book suggestion, I am going to check that one out.

  7. this post is so refreshing to me...the honesty, the "I know exactly what you mean" element. I love the idea of one hour of quiet. That is so important. I'm finding now, with emma only napping here and there in the afternoons, that I really need some space from her. (that sounds horrible to say, but I think you know what I mean.) We used to do quiet times, but i've let it go. I think i need to go back to this.

  8. Oh man do I know that feeling! Out of the blue, all my old standbys will cease to have any affect at all. It's like they develop a resistance to Mommy tricks!

    Quiet time sounds niiiiiiiiiice! I'm going to have to give that a more concerted effort one day. My kids think they're being punished though, if I tell them to spend some time alone :-) Sheesh.

  9. I don't remember how well those "quiet times" worked, but must admit to missing the noise and the quiet times of children in the house. Not that I want it back mind you, it's just good memories!
    I love it when we all get together, maybe this summer at Jan's!

  10. Love the words. Let's see, I guess 'leave me alone' doesn't count does it?!?

  11. Now you know why I told "Uncle Rob" he had to stay on his bed for an hour in the afternoons. I would surround him with books and toys, tell him I didn't care if he went to sleep but he just needed to stay on his bed for an hour. I didnt know I was actually inventing "quiet time", wish I had thought about writing a book about it. I thought I was being selfish because I needed "quiet time". LOL

  12. I love the "one, two" because we rarely get to three, don't we?

  13. this is a humbling post for me to read...so true.

  14. I tried the Positive Discipline book years ago for a while but ended up thinking that it is really just forced time out (punishment) with gentle coating. And "Punished by Rewards" by Alfie Kohn (as well as hearing him speak) has made me anti punishing because it only gives short term results. Doesn't look at the long-term relationship. You know? I ended up getting more out of Gordon Neufeld's book(still reread him). Just my unasked for two cents.

  15. Fantastic book!

    So many of us don't notice when we resort to all those negatives. The fact that you see it, and that you want to try something different is so commendable.

    PS...we call is "Sanity Time" in this house.



email: mollydunham@sbcglobal.net
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