6.08.2011

I don't always know what to bring to this space. Sometimes it's a struggle, so I don't bring anything at all. But this space, this blog, isn't the only space with which I struggle. I question what I bring to many spaces in my life, especially the social spaces I encounter when I venture out of my preferred space at home. Silence fills the space I don't know how to fill.

But this morning, as I sat at my sewing machine, feeling the gentle breeze through open windows, listening to the kids sling marbles across the yard, pondering the sweet emails I received from friends who missed me at Squam, I had an epiphany of sorts (though it might have been the sunny, 70 degree weather going to my head), and I had to rush to this space to tell you:

When I bring myself, I bring enough.

The same is true for you. When I visit your space, your presence is exactly what I'm looking for. I get so much from the little details you share. Don't underestimate what you bring to your space. You can inspire without even trying. Maybe especially when you don't try.

my view

Months ago, Tara shared something about catching a glimpse of her own reflection in the window at night. Her post had nothing to do with window coverings, or the lack thereof, but I realized at once my blinds had to go. They inhibited my reflection. Just that one little detail about her space completely transformed my own space. My windows have been bare since February. It was my bare windows that led to my epiphany this morning.

There are certain parts of myself that I question - sometimes fear - bringing to this space and other social spaces. What if I'm not enough? What if I bring or say or, heaven forbid, wear the wrong thing? I'll bet some of you have similar reservations. Just like me, you put blinds on your windows. But when you can't see your own reflection, others can't see you either.

I want to bring more of myself to this space. The little details, and the big ones too. The things I believe, even if anonymous commenters tell me I'm wrong. I want to bring less of what I think you want to see, and more of the me I glimpse in my bare windows when the sun goes down.

Even if I'm interrupted 50 times during the 4 to 5 hours it takes me to post a few hundred words. I'll bet you know something about that too.

37 comments:

  1. I think this is an especially timely thought. It seems there is a bit of "am i enough" spring fever circulating in the mama world. We are all enough, and really interesting too.

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  2. Couldn't agree more! The light that comes with the uncovering is cleansing and invigorating, windows or otherwise. I enjoy your blog so much.

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  3. I connected with this post right from the first sentence, Molly. I enjoy writing my blog and I want it to be a reflection of myself. Every so often, this little voice will speak up and suggest that maybe others would like to see such and such or this and that. One of the lost comforting things one can see is ones reflection staring back. Thanks for taking down the blinds, Molly.

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  4. Yes, yes times a thousand! Your words were as if they were being written from my very heart.

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  5. What lovely, wise words. Thank you! I needed to read that.

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  6. i am curious to see where this leads you. I've always enjoyed you and what you share here.

    i struggle with sharing - everything. Not sure of the internet is where I need to let it all out. Seems like I always go back and delete those type of posts.

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  7. Awesome post-thanks for sharing. You are bold! Awesome header picture too! Thank you again!
    Vanessa

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  8. Wonderful post. Want to come speak to my students. They spend so much time wishing to be something and not appreciating what they are. Poor little buggers. Wise words. I appreciate them. This is always a thoughtful place to come. Thank you.

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  9. I love these thoughts. My three year "blogday" is tomorrow, and I've been thinking about my space, and what it means to keep it. Since I had my third child and returned to work full time, sometimes it's been hard to feel like I'm filling my space. But I am, even if it's a little different. Different is good. Thank you for these words of wisdom.

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  10. When I bring myself, I bring enough.

    How... surprisingly simple. And exactly what I needed to hear today.

    Thank you.

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  11. I've been pondering this very thing recently. Thank you for reminding me that I'm enough. That really I just need more "me" in my blogging.
    I enjoy visiting you here and add hunt and peck with babe in arms to the 4 to 5 hours of writing and that describes me as well.

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  12. The reason I come check your blog space EVERYDAY to see if there is something new is simply for YOU. Your writing is interesting, genuine and often intriguing.

    Thank you for that and I look forward to much more of it... I hope! :)

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  13. Your words are always so touching, Molly. I've been thinking along the same lines lately, especially with the physical/mental change that has been going on with me. Just this week I seriously debated over posting a photo of myself & the family at Disney world - I think I look horrible all puffy & pregnant, and I HATE DW, but the reality is that's me, how I look right now. My kids were thrilled to be there even if I wasn't. Part of my blog is documenting my life, and I'd be silly to leave something like that out for such silly reasons.
    You're absolutely right, we are enough.

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  14. Bring it! I would love to know more about the real you, little things or big.

    I struggle with this exact dilemma about blogging...finding the balance between writing about what I suspect others will connect with (because connecting with other is satisfying) and writing about exactly what I'm thinking/feeling/going through. Ultimately, I try to write about the latter and am tickled when the former happens!

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  15. Plus, you're so talented! Your words, pictures and points of view are so interesting. I really enjoy and admire the parts of yourself that you bring to this space. Keep doing your thing.

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  16. You are right....WE ARE ENOUGH! We can only be who we are. When we forget that, we have lost ourselves.

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  17. beautiful post and so very true! and yes, i know a thing or two about interruptions and distraction. just keep plugging away at being you - it's why we come here to read and enjoy.

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  18. Thank you. I always feel a little funny when people ask what their readers want to hear. I want to hear you! That's why I'm here! Though, as a slightly shy person by nature I find that is certainly easier said than done.

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  19. Thank you for this reminder. I enjoy every thing you bring. I try to remind myself that what I bring to the table has value. It is enough, and it is me. Thank you so much for being there. I know if you lived closer, you would be part of my mama tribe.

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  20. put so perfectly. Sometimes I want more for my blog, but really, when I look back at what I have there I am totally in love with it and the moments I have shared...even if no one else is reading my words, I am (and maybe my kids one day?) and that is enough.

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  21. "When I bring myself, I bring enough." yes, yes, yes. i have been struggling with this myself lately ... your wise words are very timely.

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  22. Like from your last post - I got the idea to replace the plastic feeder bottle with a glass jar for my next batch of chicks. That was so clever of you!

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  23. that's exactly what I love about other peoples blogs... the random details, that I'm too frightened to share on my own blog with the fear of who will care?

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  24. I am smiling. My huge front bay window has not had any window coverings on them in years. And we do not live in a beautiful place, kinda ghetto actually, but I couldnt bear to have to light blocked. So people can see us eating dinner if they walk by, but so what. So much of our lessons I feel like are about what you say, being comfortable about ourselves and our reflections...and that includes the good with the bad...and accepting them both which make up who were are right now. I too am trying to break free fro my own limitations. I think we all are on one level or another..and the great thing about blogging is that we kinda help each other along...through our words...so keep going. You are a true inspiration to many.

    :)Lisa

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  25. I liked these lines: "You can inspire without even trying. Maybe especially when you don't try." Very true. When we set out to write what we think our readers want or, gasp, we set out to inspire, there's always a sheen of falseness over the writing. I often find that the posts I don't plan, the ones that just roll out of me, often get the most response. I think readers sense the truth in those.

    I think you often write brave posts. That's why people like me like you so much.

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  26. I like this very much.
    I think blinds are overrated.

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  27. I enjoy your blog so much. Put so perfectly.

    Silver MLM

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  28. AnonymousJune 12, 2011

    I don't even have the nerve to have a blog...I have been pondering it for 2 years! Yours is always so lovely though, thank you. Alison

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  29. When I bring myself, I bring enough.
    Okay, just trying it out. Feels so right, so good. Thank you for this lovely post.

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  30. This is beautiful. I so enjoy coming to your space to read things like this.

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  31. could you please stop crawling into my head and writing my thoughts exactly (but in a much more concise/poignant way than I could have)?

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  32. i love this, molly. and i agree. when you bring yourself, you bring enough. thanks for reminding me.

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  33. Molly, this is so beautiful, and so perfectly put. You bring so much to this space, and I appreciate all that you share.

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  34. You have a way with words, my dear. And those windows and absolutely killing me. May I have them please?

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