We had an awkward and uncomfortable parenting situation the other night. No details necessary; I find it best just to pack up the lessons learned and move forward when challenged as a parent, leaving the messy details behind. This of course is easier said than done. Nothing rankles my nerves or ruffles my feathers quite like tough parenting moments.
George is a different kind of bird, though. While I run around with my feathers all askew, he sits calmly. Like a water bird, everything just rolls right off his back. Over the years, he's learned how to use his cool calm to smooth my feathers.
"You know the great thing? We have tomorrow," he said as I stood fretting.
He was right. The next day things were much better. The moment had passed, and with a little perspective I was able to pack up the lessons I had learned. Lessons which will no doubt prepare me for my next parenting challenge. The foremost lesson is that we have tomorrow.
These daffodils were straining under the weight of snow, but by the next day the snow was gone and the daffodils once again stood tall. Tomorrow has the ability to remove many a burden; it may just be the perfect antidote to stressful situations.
Hopefully the awkard moments won't be remembered when they grow up. It will surprise you what they bring into adulthood. Isn't it wonderful to have someone to share the responsibilities with? When one is ruffled the other is calm, cool and collected.
ReplyDeleteRock on. Sounds like you make a good parenting match! Here's to a great day today!
ReplyDeleteSo so true. Tomorrow is always a new day. And we've all been there on the awkward parenting moments.
ReplyDeleteTo keep myself sane, I assume we're just giving our kids ammunition for the natural "I'll never do that when I'm a parent!" impulse. Apparently my grandchildren will have tvs in their rooms from birth and soda in their bottles. Oh, and they will always go out to eat. And they will get whatever they want whenever they want. I'm looking forward to seeing it. ;)
"Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, Tomorrow, you're only a day away!"
ReplyDelete(can you tell I like Annie?)
That's what we tell ourselves, too and before I turn out the light for the kids at night, I tell them, "tomorrow is a brand new day."
Oh hon! Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI've got one of those calm ones too... which is such a good thing because I am most assuredly NOT calm in moments like those.
the promise of a new day is all that i can hang on to sometimes....
ReplyDeletebtw, i'm grateful to be in this parenting roller coaster with you ;)
Isn't it wonderful when our husbands ground us? My husband is opposite of me in a lot of ways, but its great because he can always calm me down. :)
ReplyDeleteVery well said - although the rain was needed - hopefully the sun shining in this morning will make today even brighter.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the midst of a parenting "I don't know what to do" situation right now and I keep finding myself bogged down with this ridiculous idea that I have to do the right thing today so as not to mess up tomorrow. It's flawed thinking for sure!
You reached for the better thought - you focused on today and held belief that tomorrow would be better.
I have the same type of husband...calm and cool.
ReplyDeleteI will take a lesson from those lovely daffodils today!
What a sweet reminder. Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteHusband's are wonderful for that balance...I know I am so thankful for my "water bird" as well.
ReplyDeleteI really loved your connection of these situations to the daffodils; heavy with snow one day and standing tall and beautiful the next...even stronger from the load they bore the day before. Lovely to remember.
Been through those moments, they are not fun, but if we learn from them, then we are better because of it.
ReplyDeleteLooking at tomorrow as a new day is a wonderful quality to cultivate.
My husband is the calm one too. He is a good balance to my high spirited sometimes overly anxious personality!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you feel better about it all today. :)
Have a great day! Karen
i'm having one of those days. this is perfect. now i can try to keep it all in perspective.
ReplyDeleteYour snow-covered daffodils are a striking metaphor. Thanks for the lesson of your lesson!
ReplyDeleteAnd I always thought you were the calm one...like me!
ReplyDeleteLove
Dad
have I told you lately how much I appreciate the honesty in your blog? life's not always pretty and perfect, but there is always hope and grace!
ReplyDeleteSo so true!
ReplyDeleteA timely post for this quote I saw at bara.
ReplyDelete"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." (Emerson)
This is the link: http://www.ohbara.com/2009/02/it-was-not-adventure-it-was-my-life.html
Wishing you strength and peace.
ReplyDeleteyou're not alone.
ReplyDeletethere is no job more difficult then being a parent. there is also no job more rewarding. prayers.
Before turning off the light after a particulary challenging parenting day, my husband and I will turn to each other and say, "Tomorrow is a new day." That piece of piece of hope helps me sleep.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your inspiring words and photo of the daffodils. I am going to remember to come back and gaze at those resilient flowers and remember that I too can be resilient.
I enjoy your blog...I am thrilled with the realness you share here.
ReplyDeletethank you!
~simply~
(I have mentioned you on my blog today)
I think my best parenting strategy is believing . . . I believe my son/daughter will turn out happy and successful (by whatever standards of success they set for themselves). I believe, I believe, I believe. I chant it over and over. Sometimes when I am overwhelmed (a lot) it's all I've got.
ReplyDeletesuch wise words
ReplyDeleteParenting, the ultimate team sport.
ReplyDeleteYour perspective is generous and loving - thank you...I need it right now. We are going through rough stuff with him and the hearing issue and I am having a hard time keeping my history and emotions at bay; Jeff is a rock. Your story gave me some context.
Thanks God for the tommorrows! I have ackward parenting moments all the dang time...
ReplyDeleteMy Hubby and I run opposite of each other. On some issues, I am so laid back and he freaks out. Then on others he is the level headed one and I am having a nervous breakdown. I love that about us.
molly ~ as always, you bring real life to the rest of us. i'm thinking of the oddness of those parents who seem always on point, always so graceful, even in their humanity. it must be a lonesome world for them, holding it together like that. thanks for the breathing space. xoxo
ReplyDeletethis post could be cut straight from the pages of my life. some tough parenting times lately have got me worn out. dan sounds a lot like george, always reminding me that this is a phase, that this will get better, we'll work it out. he remains calm while I'm at my breaking point and doubting everything i have ever done. there is always tomorrow--i'm glad for the promise of that.
ReplyDeletelove this, molly!
ReplyDeleteas i read this i thought about our tough moments. i see myself as the calm one. always smoothing my husbands feathers. i really love how you put that!
Do you know Kevin Henkes' Lilly books? We often quote Mr. Singer's observation that "Today was a hard day. Tomorrow will be better." And it just about always is.
ReplyDeleteYep, I love your honesty too! Nobody has perfect children and nobody is the perfect parent. I'm finding that with teenagers those awkward and incomfortable parenting situations are even more awkward and uncomfortable, but they are just part of the process. My prayers are that we deal with them with enough wisdom and grace as possible and that lessons are learned and that our relationships remain intact. Thanks for the reminder that tomorrow is a new day!
ReplyDelete